Often times we discuss health and wellness with athletes in regards to the fitness. And by fitness it’s usually in regards to the 10 General Physical Skills which are as followes:
1) Cardiovascular/Respiratory Endurance 2) Stamina 3) Strength 4) Flexibility 5) Power 6) Speed 7) Coordination 8) Agility 9) Balance 10) Accuracy
However one side of health and wellness that doesn’t usually get discussed right away is mental health and wellness. This discussion seems to be occurring more and more lately. Athletes dive in and become obsessed with their performance, nutrition, WODs, ect… Don’t get me wrong there’s nothing wrong with this so long as the athlete can keep a level of balance and perspective between life and their fitness. For me this balance has become increasingly more and more difficult. I’ve always been the type of person that once my mind is made up; I dedicate everything I am to accomplishing that goal. My goal with CrossFit is to qualify for the CrossFit Games. Ever since the conclusion of last year’s Regional competition I told myself that I was going to do anything in my power to accomplish this goal. This year I’ve seen all kinds of improvements, probably more improvement than any prior year that I’ve been doing CrossFit. Over the last year I’ve meticulously monitored my diet, workouts, mobility, skills and so on. This meticulousness has allowed me to accomplish things I wasn’t able to do before in my life. However, it also began to run my life. Each day the WOD was my number one priority. I couldn’t allow myself any fun outside the gym; if I went out my performance would suffer which would take away from me accomplishing my goal. This of course couldn’t be further from the truth. I thought I was making all the right sacrifices that I needed to make in order to accomplish my goal, little did I know that by sacrificing any and almost all outside activities I was beginning to lose balance in my life. The balance of being able to work hard and also play as well, I had lost the ability to go out for a night with my Wife or friends and relax. Everything I did had a consequence behind it and would negatively affect training.
When I first started CrossFit my goal wasn’t to qualify for the CrossFit Games; the CrossFit Games were still a back yard barbeque where athletes went to hang and workout. CrossFit was a way of testing myself in ways I’ve never even thought about testing myself before. The WODs were miserable and hurt a lot, but it was the best and worst experience I had ever had exercising. Each WOD was a new challenge and a new way to test my fitness. But over the course of this last year I’ve seemed to lose perspective as to why I began CrossFit, I lost perspective as to why I loved punishing myself every time I stepped foot into the gym. CrossFit was no longer FUN, it had become a JOB. A task that I did in order to be a competitive CrossFitter, the WODs weren’t a way of testing myself anymore. They’ve become a measuring tool for measuring myself against other athletes, and in my opinion if I didn’t measure up I was worthless as an athlete. MY WOD AND HARD WORK COUNTED FOR NOTHING!!! This of course once again is the furthest thing from the truth; however that is what my thought process has become over the course of the last year.
With that being said, I’ve decided to not compete in this year’s CrossFit Regional competition. I’ve allowed my life to become imbalanced, and this imbalance has begun to negatively affect not only my training but most importantly my life outside of CrossFit. I haven’t allowed myself to be happy with the progress I’ve made over this last year because I’ve been so caught up with how or what other athletes are doing. Furthermore I’ve forgotten why I started CrossFit in the first place. I’ve finally realized that even if I achieved my goal it would be meaningless because I didn’t enjoy the journey along the way. I truly appreciate all the love and support that everyone has given me. I hope I don’t let anyone down and don’t mess up anyone’s travel planes. I’m the luckiest person in the world to have such an unbelievable family at SURGE. A long with that I hope that this post might help some of you who may have similar feelings. If so please don’t hesitate to talk to myself or Courtney. Life is a journey there are all kinds of peaks and valleys, but it’s how we manage these peaks and valley is what makes the difference. Thanks again!!!